Sex education for teenagers

Experts say it is easier to pass information on sex education to boys than to girls. Therefore, if your daughter has attained puberty, you should not hesitate to discuss sex with her.

During puberty, many adolescents turn to their friends and the media for the answers to their questions. And most of the time, they get the wrong answers. You may be surprised to learn that they always wish they could ask their own parents the same questions rather than to turn to their peers.

Besides, failure on the part of parents to talk about puberty and sex does not make the potential problems go away. By the time they clock 10 years, about 49 per cent of adolescents admit that they have had sex. The margin increases to 79 per cent by the time they grow older.

Talking about sex with your teenage child will not necessarily make him or her to explore his or her sexuality. In fact, studies have shown that an open discussion on sex can help to prevent unwanted teenage pregnancy. Do not think it is one big, difficult conversation. Instead, you should see it as a continuous conversation that should last throughout the period of adolescence.

Do not shove more content into the discussion than they can absorb and process. Tell them what they need to learn in snippets and give them enough time to think about it before inviting them to ask questions. Encourage them to share details about their life with you, no matter how embarrassing they are.

Although starting the conversation with the girls may require some tact on your part, you can let her know that you are not sure if she has started puberty and sex education in school or seen her monthly period. The truth is that many teenagers hide this fact from their parents. And many parents are unaware of how much sexual exposure their children have gained.

As you talk to them, note the changes in the bodies of the girls. The first sign of puberty is evident in the development of the breasts. As this continues, growth can be uneven. On the other hand, for most boys, development is reflected by changes in their voices and tufts of hair in their armpits.

As their breasts develop, the girls grow bigger and their hips become wider. Your daughter may be visibly worried that she is gaining weight, but explain that she is just gearing up for a growth spurt. Girls need healthy weight gain during this stage in their lives. Take care not to make them feel the pressure to diet. Remember that how you feel about yourself will be reflected in how your daughter views herself. So be mindful about what you are communicating about her body and image. For the boys, there may not be obvious changes in weight. But they may just grow taller with long bones.

Today, most Nigerian girls begin to observe their monthly periods before their 13th birthday. About 90 per cent of them get to this stage by the time they are 14 years old and 98 per cent by the age of 15. While some can’t wait to start their periods, others may be frightened or anxious. To add to their anxiety, many girls don’t have a complete understanding of their reproductive system or what actually happens during the menstrual cycle.

Tell your teenage daughter how long a period normally lasts and how often they occur. Tell her that her menstrual flow will likely last for seven days or less. Her period may be irregular for the first few years. Once their menstrual cycle becomes regular, most girls see their period every 25 to 30 days. Some get them as frequently as every 21 days or as infrequently as every 45 days. Let her know what to expect.

With boys, the testosterone gushes out fast with much pressure, thereby making them to be aware of their sexuality. This testosterone sometimes causes them to experience night emissions. This is the natural way in which the body regulates the level of semen and sperm cells in their scrotum. Please note that night emission is not the same thing as wet dreams. While night emission is done without any human effort or assistance, wet dreams are the results of sexual fantasy.

You can tell your daughter that during her menstrual period, hormones can cause nausea, cramping, and diarrhea. Talk to her about sanitary products. Explain the different options and discuss the pros and cons of each one. Show her how to use them.

Talk to the girl about the odors and discharges between periods. Explain to her that it is normal for fluid to be discharged through her sex organ as a way of cleansing itself naturally. Teach her to wipe from front to back after using the bathroom to avoid vaginal or bladder infections. Caution your daughter against using feminine sprays.

To be continued.